The Brave, The Bald and the Beautiful

Good Morning Everyone,

As our summer continues with backyard BBQ's, vacations and just plain fun, there is one thing that remains the same for the Chapman household: cancer still sucks. Ok - the good news: Bonnie continues to fight the fight by participating in Bug's Girlscout events, running errands, cooking meals that could put Wolfgang Puck to shame (you don't really believe that one, do you??!!). Although her calendar looks more like a war plan, filled with procedure strategies and doctor appointments, she keeps her strong chin up and her smile is ever present.

This Friday she will have a procedure done with McDreamy, where he will "clean up" the affected area and remove any dead skin that is handing around. Neither one of us knows exactly how he will do this, and I have to say "ignorance is bliss". It sounds gross and scary. While this is being done, the rest of the Chapman's will be off to Big Bear (another trip Bonnie gets to miss out on), now that B is out of summer school. That is one hard working student and they all deserve a little R & R. I will be ready to take on my "Nurse Ratchit" persona again. I'm just disappointed I can't take her to the appointment. I miss McDreamy with his long legs, 2 day beard and olive skin....oh, where was I?

As the effects of chemo keep appearing in various forms, the latest has been the hair issue. Over the weekend, it started to fall out so Tom had to do an emergency hair cutting. You will notice that there are no pictures of her with his haircut:)  You did good Tom! So, Tuesday night we held a "Head Shaving" party in Bonnie's honor. The smile on her face is authentic and she was very relieved to have this done. She looks great and imagine how much time this will cut off her morning routine! I thought I would let the pictures do the talking...

This is Bonnie's "selfie" as a "before"  picture:

 

And this is all from the party:

Yep, Tom did it! He looks really great too. It's interesting to see how different one can look without hair and all that prepping and primping that goes with it. No- I didn't feel tempted. I choose to support my sister in every other way (that's code for "I'm too vain").

This was a positive step for all and one more hurdle the family overcame. It was great to be a part of this night and a BIG Thank You to Lisa for her head shaving skills.

I will update again over the weekend after I get a good idea on Bonnie's progress from her procedure on Friday.

Stay healthy everyone!  Heather Gregory

"If you don’t do what’s best for your body, you're the one who comes up on the short end.” ~ Julius Erving"

 

 

 

Lipstick and chemo

Hi Everyone,

Sorry for the delay in updating all of you.  Our little sister came into town from Ventura with her husband and baby and it's been a whirl wind of fun and little sleep. Makes me so happy that SHE is the one with a baby and I have a 20 year old that loves to sleep in:)

As most of you know, Bonnie had her first chemo treatment on Tuesday, July 9th. Although you know something like this is coming, it stares you in the face every time you look at the calendar, it's still a challenge to wrap your brain around it. The unknown can be very intimidating. This, along with having her "port" put in the day before (of course, had issues with that and didn't get the type of port she was looking for), resulted in minimal sleep the night before the treatment. However, we all know Bonnie - you would never had know she was running on empty, as her spirits were up and she was talking to EVERYONE. Can someone please make it stop?!

Luckily, we planned for a long afternoon. Along with plenty of snacks for me (most importantly), we were armed with magazines, lavender oil (to cover the smell of the stinky chairs) and a beautiful prayer quilt (see picture). During the 4 hours we were there, Bonnie managed to meet a gentleman who had a relative she knows in Scripps Ranch, met another woman there for treatment with her husband, hand out more of my sleep supplements and ensure to everyone there that she would return for her next treatment loaded with home baked goods.

The staff at Ximed are the best! I can't forget to mention them. Pam and Vicki are two hard working ladies! The room was bustling with chemo patients coming and going and all in various stages of treatment. It's an odd place to be with my sister. She looks really good in her red lipstick and new haircut- so why are we here? It's just another reminder of how fragile our health is and how cancer is non-discriminating. There were young and old, male and female patients, straight and gays. Yep - all in one day. A scary sign of the times!

So far, the only side affects of the nastiness that I saw dripping into my sister's body is an upset stomach (hers, not mine). Her energy is a little low, but I suppose that is to be expected with all of the stress resting on her as well. We will continue to monitor her and watch for more side effects, as she continues on this path. Bonnie is to receive treatments every 3 weeks, with her next one TBD. 

Bonnie, Tom and the girls (and myself) continue to be grateful for all of the support and the meals being delivered to the house. It's such a relief for all of them to know that's one less thing to worry about. The meals are delicious and really appreciated.



I promise to update again after Bonnie's next hurdle. In the meantime, I send my love and thanks to you all. Enjoy your summer!

Heather

Lotsa Helping Hands link

Hi Everyone,

Happy almost 4th of July! I hope you are all able to enjoy this day of independence, watch a parade, eat junk food (Bonnie's words - not mine!) and enjoy some good ole fashioned fire works.

 

 

In anticipation of Bonnie's chemo treatments starting Tuesday, July 9th, Gina Mathew was kind enough to take the lead on setting up a social calendar for meal plans. This is something that some of you have asked about and have wanted to help out the family, so we thought this would be the best way to keep the meal deliveries organized. Please know that this is strictly voluntary and very, very appreciated. This meal train comes with deliveries on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays only. This will provide plenty of food for the family. As I will be finishing my 21 day cleanse around the time her chemo starts, I too will be very excited to taste the delicious meals!

 

 

In addition, we thought it best to restrict the meal deliveries to Scripps Ranch folks. This will help avoid any of you "San Diegans" having to fight traffic, etc. For those of you that still want to support the family in some manner, you are welcome to send Gift Cards (Islands, Chilie Peppers, Luna Grill, Sammy's, Daphne's, Rubios). Please remember: the cards, flowers, Edible Arrangements, have been more than enough and Bonnie is really appreciative (as well as the kids). Please don't feel obligated!

 

The link to the Lots Helping Hands is: https://www.lotsahelpinghands.com/c/704777/

 

Once you get to the site, please register so that you can be accepted into the "community". When you receive your confirmation email, you can then log onto the site to pick a day to deliver your meal. Once in the site, go to the bottom of the main page to "Help with a specific activity". Click on Bonnie's name and it will take you to the shared calendar. Click on the day you would like and it will open a page for you to register for that delivery day. You are off and running! 

 

Any questions on how to use the website, please see Gina's contact information on the Welcome Page (gmathew@san.rr.com).

 

 

Thanks again and have a safe 4th of July!

Heather

 



 



 

 

 





A new 'do and attitude!

Hi Everyone,

Hope you are all enjoying this great summer weather and deep fried fair food! I went to the fair the other night to see "Who's Bad", a Michael Jackson tribute band. Made me miss the King of Pop even more. There's nobody like him. On top of that, I went to the fair 2 days into my 21 days Cleanse Program - no fair food for me. Hopefully one of you will enjoy a deep fried Oreo on my behalf:)

Bonnie is going really well. She's enjoying her new found freedom and taking advantage of her driving opportunities. The frustrating part is that most of her driving involves doctor appointments instead of Girl Scout meetings or shopping for some party she is planning. Cancer sucks! However, the brave face stays on knowing that this too shall pass.

Yesterday Bonnie, Bug and B made a trip to Lisa to get a new hairdo in anticipation of the loss of her hair at some point during the treatment. Unfortunately I could not join in the event, but I know Lisa took good care of all of them. Bonnie has a zip in her step and a new hairdo to go with it. She looks great and it's nice to see the girls involved as well. Take a look:



There are a couple of issues she is still dealing with: the swelling in her arm is the main one at this point. She is getting PT to help with the range of motion and to get the fluid to drain properly. Although this is really annoying, Bonnie isn't letting that keep her down.

The next big step will be on July 8th when Bonnie goes in to have the chemo shunt (?) put in. That will be a very early morning appointment that Tom will take her to.
Chemo will start the next day on July 9th. I will take her to this appointment and entertain her with my dry wit and awesome vocal skills. No seriously - I will just sit there while she talks to every single person in the chemo room. 4-5 hours of this? I wonder if I can get a Vodka drip line for me??

The good news is that although she will be making regular trips to "Dr. Poison", our little sister and her family (including the new baby she is adopting) will be down to visit on July 12th. It will be great to see her and to get the sisters and cousins together. It's nice to have something to look forward to other than doctor appointments.

Continued thanks to all of you for your love and support. Enjoy your summer days!

Heather

Great news!

Hi Everyone,

Happy 2nd day of summer! It's a beautiful day today and I'm happy to report that Bonnie is enjoying the sunshine DRAIN FREE! Yes!! She visited Dr. McDreamy yesterday afternoon and removed the drains. No pain and a quick process. This is a big step in her recovery and she is really, really relieved to have some more freedom. Her body is still healing, but coming along very nicely. The best part was hearing she went and celebrated with a Margarita at Alfonso's in La Jolla. I'm happy that each little victory is being recognized. Wish I could have been there to raise a glass (or five) to my awesome nursing skills. After all, isn't this really what it's all about?

The next step will be to get approval to start driving. We are hoping that she will hear from him very soon, as that will be another positive step forward. It will also be another headache for me, as I will need to spend time trying to keep her from over doing it (along with the rest of you guys!). If anyone knows where I can buy one of those children's dog leashes you see on kids at Disneyland, let me know. I'm interested. I'll make it fit her one way or the other:)

 

 

 



So, along with this new found freedom, comes some challenges: can she wash her hair by herself? can she bake without full range of motion of her arms? I for one, look forward to seeing what Bonnie Crocker can produce in the kitchen.

A goal for Bonnie is to start exercising (what's that? you need to start to?). After years of teaching fitness classes, I landed on the following saying, as the best motivation: Exercise first thing in the morning before your brain knows what you are doing! It would be great if we could start a walking group combined with a weight training session with Bonnie. She would be great motivation for anyone that also wants to workout. Just be sure she has her harness on so she doesn't get too far ahead of you!



“An early-morning walk is a blessing for the whole day.”
― Henry David Thoreau


Enjoy the sunshine,
Heather

Update on Chemo treatment plan

Hi Everyone,

It's been a while! I hope all of you dad's out there had a wonderful Father's Day. And yes, if you have pets, they count as your children:)

Today was our visit to "Dr. Poison" (his words, not ours) to learn about his concept of Chemo treatment for Bonnie. It's a little strange to meet with your chemo guy and having to walk past the room where your treatment will be. Bonnie would very much like to have her treatments elsewhere - you know- in a place where there's a manicurist and a mega phone so she can talk to EVERYONE that crosses her path!

Dr. Banerji reviewed the pathology report with us, which we were pretty familiar with already. But, it was nice to get his take on it since he sees it from a different perspective. Like us, he too was disappointed to see that the 2 lymph nodes with cancer cells had ruptured the membrane. Darn it! We were almost home free as far as radiation goes, except for that. We still won't know the outcome of any need for radiation until Bonnie is further into her chemo treatments.

So, it looks like she will begin her chemo runs (no pun intended) the 2nd week of July. Not a specific start date yet, but Bonnie will make that decision this week. Her treatment will be a chemo session every 3 weeks for 6 rounds (18 weeks). We are looking at the middle of November for her to finish chemo. Then, another 3-4 weeks to recover from that before moving on with Lord only knows what else. Each chemo session is 4-5 hours and will involve numerous drugs to deal with side effects, none of which I can pronounce.

The good news is Dr. Banerji was insistent upon a few things: plenty of water, plenty of sleep and plenty of exercise! Finally! Something we both agree on! The more fit Bonnie can be, the easier the side affects will be on her.

How can you help? Please walk with her, sit with her while she rides her stationary bike, etc. Being a spin and boot camp instructor, I know she won't want me around her for any of that:)

Although Bonnie was prepared for the need for chemo, it's another thing when you have to sit down and talk a treatment plan. I could see her anxiety and uncertainty rising throughout the conversation and can't imagine what it must feel like to hear those words coming at her. I am only a bystander and it made me very anxious. Bonnie's brave face is still there, but I do also see this as a beautiful opportunity for her to get connected to her body, and let others have the joy in caring for her. I know that's what I experienced while taking care of her after the surgery. And, I know all of you that care so deeply for my sister, feel that joy too!

Her next appointment is this Friday where she returns to McDreamy and hopes to not only get the drains removed but also get clearance to drive. Watch out!

Stay tuned for more as we get closer to her start date.

Heather

At home update - Wednesday

Hi Everyone,

It's hump day and the sun is out! What more could we ask for? How about some better pain killers for Bonnie (sounds of cheering in the background). Bonnie had a visit today with Dr. Apostolitis (aka: McDreamy) and things are moving along nicely. She has another appointment next Wednesday where he will consider removing the drains. That would be a real bonus! Let's pray for this, as that would really give her some relief and a little more Independence. Wait - maybe we shouldn't pray for Independence - you know how she gets:)

I will be visiting her tomorrow and getting a birds eye view on how she is doing, so I'll update the blog tomorrow afternoon as well.

The next big appointment is on June 17th - a visit with the oncologist to learn about the chemo treatment. I'll keep you updated on that as well.

Talk to you soon!
Heather